I’ve reached upgrade eligiblity on my leased Sprint phone. Is it worth switching from the iPhone XR to the iPhone 11 for the same monthly lease amount? I’m thinking mostly about going from the XR’s single camera to the 11’s wide and ultra-wide with “night mode”.
Somehow I misplaced where I saw this, but check out Neal Agarwal’s “Printing Money” if you’ve somehow forgotten how much the Haves have that you don’t. Now someone do Tom Steyer and Mike Bloomberg.
Cool, I’m once again staring at an imminent rental agreement termination at 11:59pm next Tuesday if this rent does not get properly paid, and between here and there is a three-day weekend.
I’ve turned all of my Goodreads shelves other than the
to-consider one into lists on my Bookshop page, minus books only available as ebooks (that’s coming to Bookshop soon, supposedly). Bookshop will be replacing the current in-house sales links on IndieBound, and purchasing through my page or any of my individual book links gives me an affiliates cut, and puts money into a pool of funds that gets divied up amongst independent bookstores.
I don’t know who that is but given that I can’t support myself and depend on someone else paying for my coop maybe they’ve got the right idea.
It’s too bad the anxiety meds that arrived today won’t take effect immediately since once again my rent didn’t get paid and I’ve received another 72-hour notice. I’m pretty sure there’s a point at which this can’t happen again without being kicked out period.
It looks like what I set up as a monthly Chewy delivery is almost exactly what I need for the cats over the course of a month, and looks to be something less than $35/month including shipping. So, I guess this will work, and also lessen the burden of hauling food and litter.
This morning I spent $20 on breakfast out because I needed to fortify myself against the dramatic mental dive I expect post-acquittal. Of course, this now restricts budgeting for the rest of the first half of the month, which itself impacts my mental state. I can’t win.
Somehow I managed to finesse my collapsing end-of-month budget to leave room for the requisite zoo-trip lattes, which means I will head there tomorrow in the overcast, high-50s weather even if it kills me.
Somewhat at sea. The inevitable rent-increase notification after the property on which I live was sold a few months back arrived today in the mail. Republicans are about to in effect codify that the President (as long as he’s Republican) can do whatever he likes in the service of his own reelection. Design stuff I was trying to figure out last night for the blog has reached a point just shy of where I need it to be but I don’t understand how to do anything more. Here insert any number of items from the long litany of things that are neither in place nor progressing. Sinking into myself, whoever that even is.
I guess if I start a seven-day trial of CBS All Access tomorrow, I can get in a bunch of 🖖 with season two of Short Treks, then this week’s Picard, then watch next week’s Picard, then cancel. Then at a later date I’ll have to buy a month to catch up in a binge.
On the downside, I felt so physically unwell today that I opted to just sleep from 4:00pm until 7:00pm. I made it until 6:00pm but stayed in bed. On the upside, that’s the same period as a “peak time” event at my electric company so maybe I saved some money what with me not using any power.
Wonder of wonders, today there already was voicemail from the contact at SSA saying that in fact they have sent my primary care physician a copy of that “consultive exam” I’ve been trying for over a year to get my hands on. He didn’t say when they did that; it would have to have been fairly recently. So recently that my doctor wouldn’t have gotten it yet, else she’d have mentioned it to me. I’ve asked her about it before I go follow up with him about it, if I have to do so. But, I’m now theoretically this close to finally seeing what precisely in the report from that two-hour, paint-by-numbers, plug-and-play office visit assessment session yielded a lack of eligibility.
Why is everyone buying only the “ugh.” shirts? There are like a dozen ways to express your quiet disgruntlement! That one version must have gotten linked somewhere, or maybe keeps making its way around Threadless follows? I’ve no way of telling.
While I agree with Erin Bulluss and Abby Sesterka that “a diagnosis of autism in adulthood can change self-concept for the better”, it also can do this to a much lesser degree than they describe. It’s true that I’ve said that my midlife diagnosis changed some thinking about my having been a failure and a fuck-up for several decades, but it’s also true that I’ve said that post-diagnosis I’ve come to feel that in a sense I’m a failure and a fuck-up even at being actually-autistic, in that had I greater support needs it would be too obvious for me to be denied that support, else had I fewer support needs I might be able to manage on my own. Instead, I appear to have landed right in the mediocre middle that appears to be a dead angle to many of the venues and avenues of support. Much of their description of being autistic matches my own, for example, yet they also “both work in areas that are high pressure, emotionally and cognitively demanding, and involve frequent and inflexible deadlines”—emphasis on the “both work”. Whatever level of supports Bulluss and Sesterka require, it doesn’t appear to be such that it prevents or precludes economic self-sufficiency. Which is a perfectly legitimate way to be actually-autistic, of course, and neither they nor anyone else needs my say-so on that. It’s just that there seem to be plenty of people describing their lives as autistic people who nonetheless are managing, and not so much people noticing that there also are those of us out here who are reasonable intelligent, reasonably competent people who nonetheless, despite now having started their sixth decade, have never been economically self-sufficient in their entire lives. Would having known I was autistic the entire time have changed my employment fortunes? (See the “missed opportunities” bit in this piece on a so-called “lost generation” of autistics.) There’s no way to tell, although there’s no question in my mind that I now can peg the dismal fate of every single job I’ve ever had to being autistic without knowing it. Except for my most recent one, a job placement through Vocational Rehabilitation which therefore included accommodations, that nonetheless blew up in my face and resulted in shutdowns and sobbing fits such as I’d never before experienced in my life. As near as anyone paying close enough attention to tell can tell, I seem to be too autistic to support myself and yet at the same time not autistic enough to receive financial supports instead. My midlife marks the moment I went from being a failure and a fuck-up, through an autism diagnosis that said I wasn’t, into… feeling like I’m a failure and a fuck-up as an autistic person. So how’s your Saturday night going?
I’m about to buy both 🐈 food and litter, and I need this time around to track how long each lasts and how often the re-up happens, because if I can switch to a regular Chewy delivery that will help in a few different ways. Right now, though, I have no idea how much I’m technically spending every month on this, because I always forget to pay attention to it. This is complicated by my cats’ new veterinarian suggesting that with both cats now technically being considered seniors, I should be adding wet food to their diet; I don’t see any way to do that without increasing costs, which isn’t an option. So, first step: determine what I’m paying every month as it is.
ETA: The potentially-fatal flaw in the Chewy idea is that on my next-to-nonexistent budget, being able to smooth out costs between two different halves of the month often is a life-saver. I’m not sure it’s feasible to pay for a monthly Chewy delivery.
“[I]t should be about identifying what is causing distress collaboratively with the person,” writes Sonny Hallett, “and addressing that with an acknowledgement of the broader context in which they exist.” This is certainly true. What’s causing much of my distress, however, is that despite a ruinous decades-long job history which now is clearly explained by my then-undiagnosed autism and so lack of accommodation or mitigation and a recent post-diagnosis job placement through Vocational Rehabilitation which despite accommodation and mitigation nonetheless wrecked me, I am not considered disabled enough to qualify for financial supports beyond SNAP benefits, and so once I’m finished draining my family finances dry, I will have nothing. Who, tell me, is going to address that?
Oh hey look, my Threadless store sent me my first $15. You, too, can send me money by expressing your quiet disgruntlement (and other things).
It was almost a year after diagnosis, I think, before I picked up a $20 pair of shooting earmuffs to cut down on the sound of the world around me when out and about. To this day, I’ve not tried out a pair of actual noise-canceling headphones, but this has me wondering if I’m missing out on something I actually need or if in fact I’m fine with what I have. It’s not lost on me that there’s a large cost differential between a $20 pair of shooting muffs and a piece of electronics that costs $100, $200, $300, or more, depending.